So good morning my lovelies. Yes, today is October 31, 2008, or also known as Halloween. This isn’t going to be about Halloween, so don’t get crazy and roll your eyes. In fact, this isn’t going to be another blog about Hollywood gossip or about McCain and Palin and Obama. Heck, I think the internet and the media have overkilled the crap out of that. Even SNL, which by the way is absolutely hysterical with Tina Faye playing Sarah, will not get mentioned. And 30Rock . . . which is just about the funniest show on national television, won’t get mentioned, either. No, today’s column is about plain ole stuff. Real stuff. Everyday in your life, stuff. So on with the stuff.
I would like to kick off this column with something that may gross you out, but I believe it deserves an honorable mention — and then I won’t bring it up again . . . what’s with the nose picking? I’ve mentioned this before and swore that I wouldn’t mention it again, but I can’t resist. I’ve seen more people picking their noses in the last week than I have in my life. And what gets me is that they think they aren’t being watched. What kind of enjoyment are these people getting? Can someone please write me here on this column and explain this. And I won’t mention this again. Okay. Moving on.
So I’ve been talking to some friends who say that this is going to be a really cold winter here in New York. And I’m thinking that I cannot do another really cold winter. I simply cannot do another snowy, wet, gray winter. Know what I mean? I need warm and soothing, with blue skies and white, fluffy clouds rolling by–with the green ocean waves swirling around my ankles. Ahhhhhhhhhh. Oh, sorry. Got carried away. So what does a person do when they can’t afford to pack it all up and move to the west coast or a tropical island? You go and get a portable heater, a DVD about the Caribbean, one bottle of Jack Daniels–with a tiny red umbrella, and a CD of visualization exercises. Okay. Moving forward.
Mimi, a really good friend of mine, is having boyfriend troubles. She was in his apartment the other night, waiting for him to come out of the shower, when his cell phone went off. Of course, she did what any normal, intelligent chick would do–she picked it up. Turns out that the caller was another woman, but not just any other woman, his ex-girlfriend. She listened to make sure that he was still actively engaged in his shower and then played the message. It wasn’t good. The ex wanted to know if she could meet up with him at a different time for their date on the following night. Uttt ohhh. Stay tuned for this.
I have two friends who live in Florida who are roomies. One friend called me the other day to complain that the other friend is driving her crazy with her non-stop chattering. This friend talks when she gets up, while she’s eating, while she’s dumping, and even while she’s sleeping. What is a roomie supposed to do?
And guys . . . whatever you do, don’t lie to your boss. Once, twice, three times, and the ad goes into the Sunday newspaper to replace you–behind your back. And if you have a secret, keep it a secret. The fastest way to get your business around the work place is to tell a friend.
So have a great Friday people and remember this: If you think someone is talking about you, they are.